God and Peter are playing golf

by Rudolf Faix Tuesday, October 27, 2015 1:41 PM

God and Peter are playing golf.

God distorts his tee shot and the ball rolls towards to the bunker.

At the moment comes a mouse grabs the golf ball, then a cat cat catches the mouse, then comes an eagle and grabs the cat and swings with her into the air, afterwards a flash strikes in the Eagle with the cat, mouse and the golf ball.
The golf ball falls exactly into the hole.

Says Peter: "What is now? Are we playing golf or are we fooling around?"

 

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Church | Golf

Two golfers on the 12th green

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 6:43 AM

Two golfers on the 12th green when a funeral procession passes. One pauses in the game and bows briefly to the hearse out.

"But that was a very noble gesture from you." His partner says appreciatively.

"Well," says the other, "if you were married at least 25 years ..."

 

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Relationships | Golf

Two women playing golf

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 5:31 AM

Two women playing golf. The one makes the tee-off - strong, fast, far - and in the middle of a group of golfers.
One of the men grabs immediately between the legs and falls over like a felled tree.
The two women to rush to help. The poor guy wallows on the ground moaning, hands still between his legs.

One kneels down and says to the injured, "I am masseuse, maybe I can help them and alleviate their suffering."

He refuses groaning.

She feels guilty for the constitution of man and pushes with gentle force his hands to side, cautiously opens his pants and begins to massage him in the genital area. His face expression shows after a short time that it's been getting better. Be her question as for his being now he replies: "Down there I feel great, but my thumb does still hurt like hell ..."

 

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Women | Golf

A couple is playing golf

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, October 25, 2015 2:46 PM

A couple is playing golf. To their horror, a straight severed golf ball is flying through a window, which shatters into many small fragments. The couple, conscious of guilt, goes immediately to communicate to the owner of the house.

Both shout, but nobody answers. They walk into the room where the broken window and see a broken vase next to a man with a turban on his head.

"Are you the owner of the house?" asks the husband.
"No, I was locked up in 1000 years of this vase, but someone has shot this golf ball through the window, it knocked over the vase and now I am free!", the genie answered.

The husband, not stupid, and asks the same: "Oh, you're a genie!"
"Correct. I fulfill you 2 wishes. Because I am so stingy, I keep the third for me."

Okay, the husband thinks and says the same: "Super So, I want an annual income of US$ 1,000,000, tax-free!"
"Is taken. Your second wish?"

"Och ... always good food!"
"This is also done. Now my desire. I have not seen a female for 1000 years, let alone touched, let me go to bed with your wife."

The couple agrees and a few minutes later the wife and the genie are strong there, while the husband again dedicates his golf game.

"How old is your husband?" asks the Spirit.
The woman replies: "31"

"And he still believes in genies?"

 

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Men | Women | Golf

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