As God had created the Swiss, the Swiss had grown him immediately to the heart.

So the Lord asked him: "My dear Swiss, for you what?"
The Swiss wanted beautiful mountains with lush green meadows and crystal clear mountain streams.

God fulfilled this wish him and asked again: "What do you want more?".
To the Swiss: "Now I wish healthy, happy cows, who give the best milk in the world on the willows".
God fulfilled this desire him, and the Swiss molk one of cows and had a glass of the wonderful good milk cost God.

And again, God asked: "What do you want more?"
"Two Swiss francs and fifty for the milk!"

God and Peter are playing golf.

God distorts his tee shot and the ball rolls towards to the bunker.

At the moment comes a mouse grabs the golf ball, then a cat cat catches the mouse, then comes an eagle and grabs the cat and swings with her into the air, afterwards a flash strikes in the Eagle with the cat, mouse and the golf ball.
The golf ball falls exactly into the hole.

Says Peter: "What is now? Are we playing golf or are we fooling around?"

What did God say after he created the man?

I can do it better.

First God created man.

Afterwards he created woman.

When he saw what he had done, he took care of the tobacco and alcohol.

As with every human being at some point comes to an end. Once, so it comes naturally for our Pope too.
Well, the pope dies and stands before the door of heaven. Nothing happens.
Quietly, he knocks on, and noticed that the door is ajar. He opens it and finds not one.
He wonders: "No one who greets me. No welcoming committee?"

At least one plate is set, reads: "To the apartments of the pope along here."
The Pope follows the signs, enters his well-furnished room and found a plate with yogurt on the table.
"Hmm, well, bit skimpy for a welcome dinner, but what the heck," he thinks and eat it.
The next day there again yogurt. And in the evening again. And the day after.

The Pope is thinking and also throws a look out the window at the hell that you can see from above quite well. There is feast with women and wine, vegetable and meat.

"Very well," the Pope thinks, "I should get well-tested here." He awaits the things to come.

Boring dying three weeks later, only yogurt is for the Pope too monotonous. Indignant he sets out to the chef and confronts him: "The whole day only yogurt. Is there not something else available?"

God replies: "Do you really think that I'll cook for the two of us?"