The doctor explains to the patient with a worried expression ...

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, November 1, 2015 7:00 AM

The doctor explains to the patient with a worried expression: "You absolutely must stop drinking, your last blood sample has evaporated, before I could analyze it!"

 

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Doctors

Why are you running out of the operating room?

by Rudolf Faix Thursday, October 29, 2015 9:00 AM

Asks the doctor the patient: "Why are you running out of the operating room?"

Patient: "The sister has said: Do not worry, that's just a simple appendectomy. You are are able to handle it."

Doctor: "And what's wrong with that?"

Patient: "She did not say it to me. She said it to the surgeon ..."

 

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Doctors

Doctor, how can I get an age of 100 years?

by Rudolf Faix Tuesday, October 27, 2015 2:58 PM

Man at the doctor: "Doctor, how can I get an age of 100 years?"

Doctor: "Do you smoke?"
Patient: "No."

Doctor: "Do you eat excessively?"
Patient: "No."

Doctor: "Do you go to bed late?"
Patient: "No."

Doctor: "Do you have affairs with women?"
Patient: "No."

Doctor: "Why do you want to get so old at all?"

 

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Doctors

The doctor asks his patients to the treatment room

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 4:11 AM

The doctor asks his patients to the treatment room and says: "I have a good and bad news for you."

The patient says: "OK then they say only the good me."

The doctor says: "A disease is named after you soon."

 

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Doctors

Participants: nurse and a totally nervous doctor.

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, October 25, 2015 11:27 AM

Participants: nurse and a totally nervous doctor.

Doctor: Sister (roars) nurse!!!

Nurse: Yes?

Doctor: Give me times a piece of paper (the doctor scribbles around on it)

Nurse: But sir ....
Doctor: Please do not interrupt me ...

Nurse: Yes, but sir ....
Doctor: Please do not interrupt me ...

Sister: But sir, you are writing with the thermometer.

Doc: Then you go and look in which ass you'll find my pen!

 

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Doctors

Patient: "I suffer from insomnia!"

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, October 25, 2015 11:05 AM

Patient: "I suffer from insomnia!"

Doctor: "Aha here I prescribe them a good aphrodisiac.."

Patient: "Hmmm THEREOF should I go to sleep ...?"

Doctor: "No, but staying awake is much more amusing ..."

 

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Doctors

A man comes to the doctor

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, October 25, 2015 11:02 AM

A man comes to the doctor. The doctor tells him that he had a serious, contagious disease. For the treatment he will prescribe mud baths.

Hopefully asks the patient whether it would be better to him.

"That's not - but you get used to talk on the damp earth."

 

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Doctors

Ask the patient: "Is it bad with me, Doctor?"

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, October 25, 2015 10:59 AM

Ask the patient: "Is it bad with me, Doctor?"

Doctor: "In your case I would not buy a LP."

 

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Doctors

A man in a white coat enters the hospital room ...

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, October 25, 2015 10:56 AM

A man in a white coat enters the hospital room and asks the patient: "How tall are you?"

Patient: "Doctor, I'm 1 meter 83 or 6 feet"

Man: "I'm not the doctor, I am the carpenter."

 

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Doctors

Patient: "Doctor, I still hear voices, but I cannot see someone."

by Rudolf Faix Sunday, October 25, 2015 10:00 AM

Patient: "Doctor, I still hear voices, but I cannot see someone."

Doctor: "When it happens?"

Patient: "Whenever I have a phone call."

 

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