The American: When our females riding a horse, they can walk with their feet at the same time - but not because the horse would be as small or has short legs. It is because our women have sooo extremely beautiful long legs!

The Frenchman: Nice! If we keep our women around the waist, we can put both thumbs forward and both index fingers together but it is not that we have so long fingers. The reason is that our women have sooo extremely slim waists!

The Italian: That's quite nice! But if we give to our women a pat on the butt before we go to work, the butt is still shaking when we come back from work. But not because of our women have so fat ass, the fact is that we have sooo short working hours!

Tourist guiding in Bern: an American constantly nag that in his home country everything is higher, wider, longer and more beautiful.

"The Empire State Building was built in three weeks", he prides himself and finally, points to the Berner Muenster, and asks: "How long has been the construction here?"

The guide listened too long, but now he bursts the collar. "Yikes", he disintegrates astonished eyes, "that wasn't there yesterday!"

A Swiss, an Englishman and an American capture a boy in the forest, which they tie to a tree. On the head, they put an Apple and refrain 30 steps.

First, the Swiss pulls out his crossbow and is aimed at the Apple.
The arrow tip pierced the Apple. With a mighty voice he boasts: "I'm Wilhelm Tell!".

The Englishman finished the same with his bow and arrow and calls: "I'm Robin Hood!"

Now the Americans emerges and the spans. He however missed the Apple and meets in the middle of the forehead of the boy. To do this he says shrugging: "I'm sorry!"