A sixteen year old boy comes into a pharmacy

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 3:54 AM

A sixteen year old boy comes into a pharmacy and says shyly that he would meet in the evening with a beautiful girl and now need something.

The pharmacist nods sympathetically: "You need a condom?"
"Yes. And besides, there's the mother of the girl, which is also very pretty and well ..."
"Do you need maybe a second?"
"Hmm, yes."
"You're right, my boy, Safety Counts."

In the evening, when the family of the girl - eating - the boy constantly holding his arm over his face and tilts his head to the floor and honors the other not even look.
After the meal the girl says to him: "If I had known what you have for manners, I would not have invited you."
"If I knew that your father is a pharmacist, I would not have come ..."

 

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Relationships

Mr. Meier is sick

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 3:49 AM

Mr. Meier is sick.
For weeks, he is no longer his old self.
So his wife brings him to the doctor, who also takes a blood sample.

The next day the nurse calls from practice:
"Mrs. Meier, us is because unfortunately a mishap happened.
The blood samples were somehow confused, and now we no longer know which is your husband ...

You can easily find out the BUT.
Go nevertheless times this afternoon with her husband into the forest and leave him there.
When he comes back, he has AIDS, if not, it's Alzheimer's. "

 

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Doctors

A Swiss, an Englishman and an American capture a boy in the forest

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 3:45 AM

A Swiss, an Englishman and an American capture a boy in the forest, which they tie to a tree. On the head, they put an Apple and refrain 30 steps.

First, the Swiss pulls out his crossbow and is aimed at the Apple.
The arrow tip pierced the Apple. With a mighty voice he boasts: "I'm Wilhelm Tell!".

The Englishman finished the same with his bow and arrow and calls: "I'm Robin Hood!"

Now the Americans emerges and the spans. He however missed the Apple and meets in the middle of the forehead of the boy. To do this he says shrugging: "I'm sorry!"

 

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General

In the hall of the chief squatting three secretaries

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 3:40 AM

In the hall of the chief squatting three secretaries.

Says one: "Yesterday I found in the desk of the boss a condom."

Says the second: "And I got stung purely a hole."

Says the Third: "I think I feel sick ..."

 

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Job / Company / Office | Women

What did God say after he created the man?

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 2:54 AM

What did God say after he created the man?

I can do it better.

 

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Battle of the Sexes | Men

A young brunette goes to the doctor

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 2:52 AM

A young brunette goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch my body, it hurts."

"Impossible," the doctor says it.

As the brunette takes your finger and presses it against her elbow and screams. She presses it against his knee and screams again, then presses it against his stomach, screaming, etc.

Then the doctor says: "You are not really brunette?"

"No," she replies, "I'm in reality blonde".

"I thought so," said the doctor, "because your finger is broken."

 

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Blondes

A woman tells her friend: "I was the one who made my husband to be a millionaire."

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 2:47 AM

A woman tells her friend: "I was the one who made my husband to be a millionaire."

Ask the friend: "Yes, and what he has been before that?"

"Billionaire."

 

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Women

Asks the son his father: "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 2:44 AM

Asks the son his father: "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"

And the father replied: "I do not know, my son I'm still paying ..."

 

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Battle of the Sexes | Men | Relationships

A young girl has been running out of gas in the Prairie

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 2:33 AM

A young girl has been running out of gas in the Prairie. An Indian takes her back on his horse. Every few minutes the rider encounters a wild scream. Finally, he sets off the girl at a gas station and rided away with a wild last scream.

"What have you done?", asks her the attendant.

"Nothing," answered the girl, "I have sat behind him and held me to the saddle horn."

"My dear child, Indian riding bareback..."

 

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General

A man and a woman get to know at the nightclub

by Rudolf Faix Monday, October 26, 2015 2:16 AM

A man and a woman get to know at the nightclub, flirting with each other violently and after 1 hour everything is clear. The two go home together and there is then done violently.

Thereupon the woman says to the man: Look, I'll go briefly into the bathroom.
The woman is in the bathroom and noticed that they scored their day and think: "Shit, what do I do now"
Then says to herself: "He will not notices that, because he is too much drunk!" and goes back to the bedroom. They then moved through the night.

The next morning the man wakes up and the woman is gone. He has a heavy head and can not remember the last night. All he knows is that he has taken a woman home. He looks beside him under the duvet and sees a huge pool of blood!!!
"What the fuck did I do last night?"

He gets up and rushes to his first gun cabinet. He controls all the weapons, noting: "I did not shot her"
Then he runs into the kitchen and checked his knife block. The blades are all complete and it did not stick any blood on it. He notes: "I did not stabbed her too!"

After that he no longer knows on and goes into the bathroom first. He looks in the mirror and is in panic firmly: "I HAVE EATEN HER!!!!"

 

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Relationships

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